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10 Ways to Build Self-Confidence


Being confident is one of the hardest battles every human could face. The lack of it can deter our path to success, let alone, living more purposefully. It is a hard thing to achieve. It took me years to really build my self-esteem and be the person that I am today. 

I chose to be a Confidence Coach because of one thing. I believed that confidence is the key to living the most awesome life we could ever live. It may sound simple but confidence can go a long way. It can shift your mindset from a slacker to a total go-getter. It is, should I say, the real definition of a life-changing miracle. 


Why do you need confidence?

Confidence, according to The Oxford Languages dictionary, a feeling of self-assurance arising from one's appreciation of one's own abilities or qualities.

If this isn’t reasonable enough, I don’t know what is. By the definition itself, confidence means believing in yourself. It means not being bothered by any adversities because you know you are capable. That was deep and powerful. Hence, I give so much emphasis to confidence. 

You need to be a confident person because you are worthy and capable. You have to trust and believe that you are. If you don’t, no one else will. You need it to push you to do things you’re scared of. You need to take back your power and go for the life you want. You deserve it. You deserve everything you worked hard for. 


How does a confident person look like?

A confident person is unapologetic. If she is a woman, she knows what she wants. She goes for it. She walks with her head held high, unafraid. She has a winner’s mindset and a lady’s class. She does not compare herself to others. She is true to herself. Above all, she never lets negative thinking get on her way. She’s a queen wearing an invisible crown. 

Years back, I hit rock bottom. My life looked good on the outside, but I felt terrible inside searching for my own purpose. I thought arrogance and cockiness was the confidence I was looking for. It was not. It’s totally different. After some deep introspection, I realized that I had three choices in life. I could live my life waiting for validations from others. I could work at a job that continues to burn me out and live in a constant state of depression. Or I could relocate my mind, shift at a 360 angle and let go of what was no longer serving me and start anew. I chose the latter. 

I was able to turn my scarcity and doubts away. I cannot be more thankful for the life I now enjoy living. It was a drastic shift. I am a living proof that everything can be manifested with momentum, confidence included. Today, I’ll let you in on my secrets.


Here it is.


10 Ways to Build Self-Confidence

1. Look Within

It always surprises me how little we know ourselves. If you have not done so already, do a self-audit. Look within you. Identify your strengths, weaknesses, fears and beliefs. List everything to have a better view of what you need to work on. 

Be nice to yourself too. We are just human beings. Imperfect but real. Whatever it is that comes out of your list, accept it and move on. The reason for this exercise is to know yourself better. Nothing more. 


2. Do Something You’re Passionate About

Something interesting came out of your list for sure. There’s always one thing you’re good at or willing to put your best efforts in. Work on it. Expand on that one thing and really leverage on it. Confidence is like fire that needs to be ignited. That one thing is what you need to get your fire burning. If you have to work on it everyday, do so. Progress. It’s your validation.


3. Find A Hero

Chances are high that someone else already took the path that you want to take. If not, there’s always one person that you look up to. It could be anyone. That person is your hero. Find him or her. The journey to confidence is rocky and steep. Your hero can make the ride worthwhile. Whenever you think of quitting, think of your hero and ask yourself, “What would my hero do in this situation?” Most times, your hero will lift you up and you can keep going. You got this!


4. Get Real

Life is full of false pretenses. Social media only reflects all the good things. Most images are curated. Don’t buy into false promises. Get real about your situation and necessary actions. No sugarcoating, s’il vous plait. Yes, the truth hurts sometimes but a lie disguised as a truth hurts so much more. 

You are not confident for a reason. It can be a past you’re not willing to accept or a future you’re afraid to face. I understand, things are scary. But hey, you are a warrior, a winner. The fact that you made it this far and emerged from your darkest moments means you’re meant for something greater. Dark moments let you see the light, remember that.


5. Think Positive

In life, not in Covid’s terms. Life is incredibly magical. Just the way we evolve from that single sperm cell is already mind-blowing. Imagine how perfectly your body works. You breathe without even thinking about it. You can do anything. 

There are tons of good things around us. Miracles happen every second of the day. Don’t focus so much on the negative things around you. Think positive all the time. Negativities are just roadblocks. They exist to develop us into the most amazing human beings that we are. It’s that bump in the road. Whenever you encounter anything negative, ask yourself, “What is this trying to teach me? “


6. Cut The Drama

Need I say more? You create your own drama. The more drama you create, the more complicated things get. Cut the drama. It wouldn’t help. And don’t complain. Complaining is like validating that you’re incapable. Don’t fret. Go back to bullet number 5 and think positive. 


7. Reestablish Your Goals

Sometimes, we establish goals with the belief that everything will go exactly as we planned. Unfortunately, we don’t live in a perfect world. Looking to the world with rose-colored glasses has more downsides than benefits. It is important that you check on your goals every once in a while and rethink and reestablish them whenever necessary. Monitoring your goals is a good practice to make sure that you’re on track with everything. Make it a habit.


8. Celebrate Your Wins (And Failures Too)

Progress is still progress, no matter how small. Being confident is hard because we give so much focus on our failures more than our successes. I’ve explained how doing everything bite-size is imperative. And don’t get me wrong. I am not saying this to divert you from making big goals. As a matter of fact, I encourage you to have bigger and more ambitious ones. And I encourage you to celebrate every part of it, the small wins or even the failures. If you succeed at one thing, you’re off to the next. If you failed, congratulations! You just found another way that doesn’t work. 


9. Practice Self-Care

Stressed people are not confident. Confident people are not stressed. 

Maybe you’re just too tired, demotivated or stressed that’s why you can’t stand with your head held high. If that’s the case, practice self-care. Show yourself some love. I have created another article to give you some tips on how to self-care. Feel free to check it out.


10. Put On A Smile

Your smile can brighten up someone else’s day. Smile often. If you’re feeling blue, smile in front of the mirror. Smiling improves your mood and gives off that happy vibe that you need to continue on the day. It is an affirmation saying “All is Well.” Confident people often smile because they are happy and contented with their current states of life. If you want to be a confident person, let the world see how beautiful your smile is. 

If you want more of these, I have put together a 4-week intensive learning that will help you believe in your abilities to bounce back quickly from your mental toughness and regain the confidence you lost in this pandemic. The program is starting on March 3rd and I am only leaving 8 seats available. Step away from procrastination, click here, DM or email me at [email protected] to get more information and get started. Hurry! Slots sell out fast.


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